December 6, 2008

• Part Deux Of My (Im)Perfect Storm Theory

  

  Okay as promised, I’m going to finish up explaining the rest of the factors in my theory.  As a reminder, these were the six factors I mentioned in my previous post, “My (Im)Perfect Storm Theory“:

  1.  Bad Timing
  2.  Distance
  3.  Being Busy
  4.  Social Circles
  5.  Standards
  6.  Friend Effect

  I already talked about the first two (Bad Timing and Distance), so allow me to finish up explaining the remaining four.  Shall we?

  3.  Being Busy

  One thing I really appreciate about being single is that I have more time to develop myself in other areas of life besides my love life.  I sorta see myself doing things similar to what the main guy from My Sassy Girl did during the two years he had to wait for his girl (except in my case, I don’t have anyone specific to look forward to ).  Like him, I got to focus more time on my other interests such as my friends, family, and tennis.  That’s why despite all I say about preferring to be in a relationship, I’m somewhat glad I am single just so I can accomplish some other important things in my life.

  Unfortunately, in doing so I kind of sabotaged my own chances of meeting someone.  Because I was studying more, spending more time doing Tennis Club stuff, and worry about the things that come with graduating, I didn’t have much chance to really meet new girls.  Since I spent a lot more time doing Tennis Club stuff, I ended up hanging out with mostly people from the club.  This leads us to the next factor:

  4.  Social Circles

  I spent the majority of my free time hanging out with people from the Tennis Club, who were mostly guys.  The small percentage that were girls were off limits due to the 1st factor (aka they were all taken), so nothing was going to happen with that. 

  Hanging out with the Tennis Club people more took me away from other social circles I used to hang out with, like my friends at the Chinese Student Association.  There was nothing wrong with them, but since almost all of them were commuters and I lived on campus there wasn’t much time we could hang out sadly. 

  I still did hang out with other people outside my Tennis Club circle of friends, but alas cliques can be a powerful thing.  There were some people I could see myself falling for throughout the past couple of years, but because they rolled with a different crowd that became a big obstacle to overcome.  If I didn’t have to worry about graduating and running the Tennis Club, I think I could been able to jump that hurdle.  Oh well.
  
  5.  Standards

  After being in a few long term relationships, my experiences have shaped me and made me discover what type of girls do and do not work for me.  I could go on and explain my preferences, but that could probably take up its own entry.  I guess if people really want to know I can write about it later.  For now though, I’ll just say I’m a bit more picky when it comes to a girl’s personality, yet less picky with appearances (although I prefer certain things of course). 

  Because of my standards, that has limited the pool of fishes I would want to catch.  My standards would be a tad more relaxed if my main objective was to just find any girl to fool around with or something.  However, finding a girl that I could see myself being in a relationship with is a whole other story.  I think when I do find someone that is that special, it will be more than worth the wait.  “The sweet is never as sweet without the bitter”, I use to always say to myself.

  6.  Friend Effect

  Ah the friend effect.  Well since I was in one relationship or another for about 4 years straight, I made quite a few good female friends over the years.  Now that I’m single, that has kind of bit my ass since many of them have friend zoned me or vice versa.  There’s this one girl (let’s call her Saffron) who fits all my standards and quite attractive to boot!  Sadly, I think we both have friend zoned each other over the years and it just doesn’t feel exactly right if we got together, even though from the outside it seems like we would fit quite well.  “I’m just mad about Saffron, Saffron’s mad about me…”

  Yes…I hate the friend effect with a passion haha.  It’s one of the factors that’s affecting me in my current situation (I’ll spill more details in the future).  It’s crazy how something like this can cause your confidence to waver at the last minute, right before you plan to make a move.  Anyways, I digress.

  So with that, I’ve finished describing all the factors that are in my (Im)Perfect Storm Theory.  I think I’m going to be good with talking about relationship stuff for a while .  Relationships are great and I would definitely prefer to be in one, but I know it’s still just one of many great pleasures in life.  It sure is fun to ponder about though!

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  Last night, some of the Tennis Club people (big surprise huh?) and I went out to Macaroni Grill to celebrate my friend Jon‘s 20th birthday (he’s the guy w/o a tie below).  Ah, next year’s 21st should be really fun .  Afterwards, we went back to UMBC and played this group game called Salad Bowl for a while.  It got pretty late, so I decided to sleep over.  I’m sorry for taking your bed Kevin!  I appreciate you for letting me have it for the night!  I’ll make it up sometime soon I promise.

  Here are some pics from the night (click to enlarge):

  

  
  
  

  Btw before anyone ask, I have noticed that my club is predominantly Asian haha.  I’m not sure how it ended up that way.  p.s. See if you can spot something “odd” about one of the pics above.

  Good luck to everyone who have finals coming up!  That’s one thing I definitely don’t miss

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